Tuesday, January 29, 2013

...and I'll pout if I want to

I’m turning 24 on Friday. I’m finally ready to admit to the fact that I’m turning 24, though my body (and anyone brave enough to hazard a guess at my age) tends to think I’m closer to 30. This is due to my child and 35-year-old husband, I think. Certain factors in my life have conspired to ensure I feel and appear older than my years. That, however, is not the point. Yep, I’m afraid I’m going to have a little birthday pout.
I wish I looked this cute when I pouted. I'd do it much more often.
Sadly, I cannot rock a gingham dress.
Image Source
Every year, I go into my birthday with no expectations. This has been the case since I was 14 and my parents chose the day of my birthday celebration to tell us that Mum was moving out. Since then, birthdays have always been a bit meh. I don’t actually remember my 16th, my 18th was memorable because my 2 best friends chose to leave my small party to hook up with the pizza boy, my 20th I had a 10-day old baby and severe sleep deprivation, my 21st both O and I had gastro and ended up in the emergency room. So most of the ‘landmark’ birthdays have passed without much in the way of excitement and I’ve learnt a valuable lesson about having no expectations.

Last year, I managed to shoot myself in the foot a little bit. I’m shocking for saying the very earnest ‘I don’t want anything, darling. Just spending time with you is enough.’ Ladies, I’m here to tell you men actually believe this!! And men: STOP BELIEVING THIS! Women love shiny things. We love feeling special and getting presents. Especially as Mummies. We spend our whole year celebrating everyone else. We do all the Easter bunny-ing, the Santa-ing, we buy all the birthday presents and plan all the parties. We cook every special meal for every event from birthdays to getting an award at weekly assembly. And we do it all without minimum complaint. 

There is one day a year that is all ours. And no matter how much we protest, we love the thought of a special cuddle in the morning where someone special whispers ‘Happy Birthday’ in our ear, then fetches our kids and has the frantic, covert ‘remember to say Happy Birthday Mummy’ conversation. We love the idea that someone other than us might organise a special cake, maybe with a single candle (anyone who lights an inferno on my birthday cake risks getting strangled) and handing us a special wrapped present, or a card – especially one our precious babies have handmade and written themselves. At the end of the day, the present isn’t actually the point. The fact that our precious family thought about us and got us something to express that thought is all-important. 

Last year, B and I had only been seeing one another a few weeks, and he took me deathly seriously when I said ‘no presents’. I ended up cooking dinner for myself, him, my housemate and a friend. I bought myself a cake from Woolworths, and another friend of mine came over for Midori cocktails. It was fun, incredibly relaxed and I ended the day happy. But if B had ignored my protestations, I would have felt that little bit special, and beyond flattered at being the person he thought of enough to buy something for. Even a silly $2 store gift. I love that shit. 
Last year's birthday cocktails. Amazeballs.

Let it be noted, I got myself my very first tattoo for my last birthday. No-one else got me anything, but I felt hardcore!
Tara the BAMF. Never again attempting a selfie of the back of my own neck.

It really is the thought that counts, unless the thought is ‘nope, this woman may do so much for me during the year, but she said no fuss, so no fuss it is!’ 
This year, if you heart me, keep your fingers crossed that B finds some way to make me feel a little special and spoilt.

Why yes, I DO Blog on Tuesdays with Essentially Jess, how kind of you to ask!


  1. Great post, you hit the nail on the head. It's -not- about the presents (altought it is nice to be wowed sometimes) it about the -thoughts-.

    You are so right that we do everything for everyone all year, and deserve to be treated a little special on our own Birthdays.

    Last year I baked my own cake, but that's ok, when Hubby Bday came around I got him a woolies cheesecake! (was a busy time of year!)


  2. My birthday is just after Christmas, so I'm always a bit meh about doing anything. The only birthday which has really lived up to expectations was my 30th. I was happily pregnant. My friend was very pregnant. Friends and family for dinner. My friends gave me a box full of 30 things for a 30 year old (most of them very silly) and my husband bought me a trip to Sydney to see the Harry Potter exhibition - a brilliant birthday in every way!

  3. hahaha, my hubby knows that's a trick.....damn straight I want a present. I wash your friggen' socks ;-)

  4. Maybe you could leave B some sly hints around the place? Hope he does get you something special. xx

  5. It's counter intuitive but birthday's get better the older you get. Bigger must be better right? My 40th was awesome. Hopefully my 50th will be even better (but fortunately its a little way off). Enjoy your 24th. I hope your hubby gets the hint.

  6. Yeah I've had some crap birthdays in my time too ... http://redlandcitylivng.com/bad-birthdays

  7. I hope he ignores you and gets you something lovely !! Thankfully A has never forgotten or listened when I said "let's not worry about birthday presents" (probably because he knows his life wouldn't have been worth living because I would be so sookie !!!).
    Have a great week - especially on Friday !
    #IBOT visitor

  8. I love birthday's and thankfully Boatman is the spoil me crazy type. I'll be thirty in just over a month. That is denial!