Friday, January 25, 2013

My First FFS Friday!!

This is an idea I can definitely get on board with!! Joining up with Dear Baby G to get a little whinge off my chest (so I can be a more upbeat bitch the rest of the week)

O’s first day of Kinder comes and goes. L and I go to pick her up, and as I pull the car out I ask ‘How was your  day?’ like the excited Mumma I am. She chews her hair and replies ‘I want Daddy’... FFS

Everytime I got anything like motivated to do anything, my blood pressure plummeted to new depths and my vision went all fuzzy (without involvement of vodka)... FFS

While O was playing with her new Barbies and the dollhouse which is more amazing than any freaking dreamhouse, she found a box from one of the Barbies and complained that she doesn’t have a Barbie car. I’ve been informed she needs one...FFS

Tried to call Centrelink (who can bite me) to rectify the fact that I’m no longer receiving ANY financial assistance at all, through no fault of mine, since they never sent me the forms to reapply for Parenting Payment and thus cut off not only PP but Family Tax Benefit... FFS

After 5 redials and 4 engaged signals, finally got through to the automated verification BS system, only to get the giggles – note to self, reading Parental Parody and attempting Centrelink contact are not tandem activities. Was subsequently cut off... FFS

O spent 5 minutes standing across the lounge room waving something at me saying ‘Mummy I found this!!’ I kept squinting at it, but couldn’t get up so I finally coaxed her into coming closer, thinking it was a misplaced diamante. The speck on her thumb turned out to be snot, which I only realised when it was shoved down my shirt... FFS

My wireless decided to crap out on me, causing panic. No wireless, no network at all...FFS

Reset the modem and, when that didn’t work, restarted the laptop. Still nothing doing... FFS

Realised (after giving up and resigning myself to using the hotspot on my phone) that I’d knocked the wireless button on my laptop to off...Oh FFS

The playroom that I spent 4 hours cleaning last week (in the process knocking myself beyond exhaustion and into bedrest) is already teetering on the edge of chaos again...FFS

And L goes home today and won’t be around to do half-assed cleaning attempts anymore...FFS

And O gets the concept of pulling toys out, but no matter how much B or myself beg, plead, threaten or bribe, cannot yet grasp putting them away...FFS

This means I’ll be forced to take her Lalaloopsy collection and deal with the OCD fit when she can’t play with them...FFS

L has apparently lost any ability to think independently. I’ve spent the whole of Wednesday having to spell out the simplest of instructions. L is 9... FFS

He suddenly has no shorts, no jocks and no t-shirts. I have none of his clothes in my clean or dirty clothes piles, and he swears they aren’t in HIS room...FFS

Fairly sure he’s hoarding dirty clothes in the crap retirement village... FFS

Going through the DVD collection for a movie to cut the bedrest boredom, and find Coyote Ugly. Do a quick mental double take and conclude I have never bought Coyote Ugly. This means it must have belonged to B pre-relationship. Is he gay?...FFS

Coyote Ugly is softcore porn. Maybe not gay, but still...FFS

B has used some of the money we got as a wedding gift to buy Jason Mraz tickets so we can have a small honeymoon in March... No FFS there!

When I asked him if he knew why Jason Mraz was so special not only to me, but to us, he said no...FFS

My walk down the aisle and our first wedding dance both happened to Jason Mraz songs. And we only got married 2 weeks ago...FFS

My husband pays no attention to the small details that make my life bareable... FFS

But still.... Jason Mraz tickets!! YAY! 

SO MUCH FUN!! Join me for a little ranting?


  1. I am not sure if what a man owning coyote ugly makes them!! I have given up and refuse to clean our toyroom. Last week in I had tidied and put away and within an hour it looked like I had never been in there. Enjoy Jason Mraz even if hubby has no idea!!
    Thanks for stopping by and commenting on my blog, I have added you to my read next week when I have 2 blissful days of only one child at home list!!

  2. Bloody travesty that you got cut off on account of my sarcastic ramblings.

    Completely unacceptable that it took you that long to get through.

    I once did a literal face palm on a Centrelink worker's desk when I gave up on the phone service and went and joined the epic queue of forever that is the local Medicare. When I finally had my turn, I was told I was in the wrong queue, because just that day they'd changed their in-office systems and I now had to go join that other queue (the one that had NOBODY waiting the entire 40 minutes I had been there). Not kidding. I face palmed her desk. She probably thought I was there for disability payments.

    1. Better to get cut off because of your sarcastic ramblings than the no reason at all I normally get cut off for!!

      If I could drive the hour to the nearest office, there's a good chance I would just to facepalm whoever is behind the desk!

  3. I used to love Coyote Ugly!! Thanks for linking up this week Tara, you gave me a good giggle x